My Burgerless Block Party
Rhys Hals tells all in this exclusive account of this year's WOBC Block Party.
By Rhys Hals
On Sunday, April 27, I attended the WOBC Block Party looking for some good vibes and fun tunes. When I arrived, False Spring was performing. Nice! So far, so good. Scanning the venue I saw cotton candy being made, t-shirts being sold, basketball being played, a bake sale, and, as promised, a grill station. Boy oh boy, nothing else could complete this sunny joyful day like a hot dog. The thing is, I don’t even like hot dogs. But it’s something I have to eat on a day like today if I want to feel as though I am truly alive. Joined by WOBC Blog director Edie Carey and Pop/Rock workgroup director Macie Slater, I made my way to the bun table, but lo and behold they were out of hot dog buns! In a compromise with the universe, I decided I could settle for a burger, which I enjoy significantly more anyway. I obtained my burger bun and cheese. Elated, I unwrapped the plastic covering of the plastic cheese, peeling it from its vacuum sealed cage. Giddy, I claimed my spot in line.
Just then, my phone rang. DJ Major Change! My secret second mission aside from grilled food eating was to conduct an interview with the one and only creator of Soundtrack of the Revolution (Mondays 12–2pm) (look out for the interview coming soon to Blog). He informed me he was behind the basketball court and I was to meet him there. Forty-five minutes later (with few of my questions answered), it was fifteen minutes past the time he told me he had to leave. I got him cotton candy for his time, and back to my burger mission I returned.
Did I really want to wait in line alone, an awkward Oliver Twist, holding my plate in front of me, begging for a hunk of beef?
By this time I had gotten a little hungry, and had thus already nibbled at my bun. My companions had abandoned me, and the grill line was just as long as it had been an hour ago. Overwhelmed, hungry, and fretting, I spotted the familiar faces of Blog workgroup members in the distance. Dodging the basketballs flying in every direction, trying not to trip over children, I scrambled my way to my comrades, all the while keeping tabs on the burger line. I was invited to dance, and so awkwardly I stood there as Time Bug performed and people did the two-step. I got some cotton candy (no paper cones, just the sticky pink ball placed in my open hands) while still clutching the paper plate, home to my lonely bun and cheese.
Just when the burger line appeared to be getting shorter, a group of four added themselves to the back. Did I really want to wait in line alone, an awkward Oliver Twist, holding my plate in front of me, begging for a hunk of beef?
Making the pros and cons list in my head, staring at the rising smoke, I was brought back to Earth by WOBC Blog director Sloane DiBari saying she and co. were planning on leaving. Looking down at my plate, I realized, in all this time I had spent thinking about the burger line, I had already eaten half my bun. Feeling sick, the rubber cheese swaddled by potato bun not going down quite right, I nodded through my haze, agreeing to make the two block trek back to campus. As we left, we passed right by the grill station. It must have been a mirage, for what I thought was a very long line was not that long at all. But that was that. I had made my decision without making a decision at all, and I left, burgerless, but not quite empty-handed. On the walk back I finished my bun, justifying the gross meal by its proximity to a grilled cheese.
Overall, it was a lovely day, fun-filled with community, music, t-shirts and cotton candy. But WOBC Block Party will never see me again: I am going on strike until I get my burger.